My name is Tim Szazynski I was a part of the Indy group for 18yrs along with my
wife Cathy. All my children (6) where born and raised there for their entire lives.
That’s all they have known till now. On a Sat. evening in August of 2005 while sitting
on my deck a man named Bryan Bearden approached me and told me of a meeting with
himself and three others. He did not disclose their names (and they remain anonymous
to this day) He told me that it was decided that I leave my house, job and the state
of Indiana. I appealed to move to Plainfield IN and keep my well paying job with
a local builder called the Estridge Group, but this was denied. When asked the reason
for my excommunication I was told it was due to unfruitfulness and that a tree that
bears no fruit must be cut down if it's had ample opportunity to produce a yield.
Legally I was not obligated to hand over my house but for the sake of my wife’s
sanity I submitted to the verdict. Me and my family of 7 others were on the street
in less than a week. We currently reside in Elizabethtown KY. I now sense a freedom
and joy that is full of glory and inexpressible. Christ is nearer, dearer and more
real to me now then at any other time during my 25yrs as a Christian. I'm sure there
is some residual negative stuff remaining in me, but I don't believe I have massive
scaring. I was in it, but never of it, due to God's kindness toward me. I choose
to view what happened like Joseph did, being fully assured that God has worked this
all out for my good. Men are responsible, but He was Sovereign in it all. It is
to "Him" that I go, for interpretation and the purpose regarding my ordeal. I am
content to have it so.
If I can be of any help to anybody you may email me
here. If you do contact me however, be willing to tell
me your name, if you can't, don't expect correspondence, unless you have a legitimate
reason. I've dealt in secrecy for almost 2 decades. That season is over, everything
must be done in the light with no obscure shadows of secrecy. Regarding my motive:
it is--- Christ, and the increase of the fame of His name and purification of the
testimony regarding Him. I get no thrill in exposing another’s weaknesses or faults,
especially when believers are involved. But sometimes the word of God must be unsheathed
for correction and rebuke as well as instruction and training. (2Tim 3:16) Remember
it has two edges. Paul thought it necessary to write a scathing letter to the Galatians
out of his jealously over gospel purity. I believe that my past 20yrs of observing
subtle and insidious legalism has been unto the furtherance of this same gospel.
To God be all the glory, honor and praise. He is worth any sacrifice or suffering.
In fact the reimbursement of joy and grace that we receive when we obey Him, more
than compensates for any sacrifices made. Till the word "sacrifice" loses its meaning.
Work is no longer work, duty is delight, giving begets receiving, death begets Life.
If more of Christ is known, if we are more conformed to His image, then may we appraise
as a believer should, and count it all as--------- GAIN! Just an ordinary brother,
tim ....
One of the most bizarre
and devastating effects of false teaching that I observed during my 18yrs in Indy
was this: Wives show no affection toward their husbands. Even queerer, they will
not gladly receive “from” their husbands. I have spoken to at least six brothers
(all who are still inside) who stated that their wives disdain physical contact.
One wife even has a separate bedroom and has not been intimate with her husband
in 6 years. I recently spoke to a brother (on the outside) who said His wife has
not kissed Him in over a decade. My experience is a decade-plus. When I attempt
to kiss my wife’s cheek as I go to work, she turns her face, and displays an expression
as if having gulped sour milk. This is very sad, very twisted and very unnatural.
I said in my first sentence that this bizarre behavior is due to false teaching.
I have neither heard nor read any "direct" instruction, teaching woman this behavior,
but through the continual emphasis of what has been called, “family idolatry,” this
perverted view of marriage has resulted. The biggest error, fostering this “anti-affection”
in my opinion is “error by omission.” The absolute and utter neglect of revealing
through scripture, the blessing, joy, privilege, beauty and yes the frolicking “fun”
of marriage. Not once do I recall the expounding of married couples conjugal rights
as as recorded in 1 Cor. 7. Never, in my recollection was the Song of Songs quoted.
I was so disturbed by this, that I asked Mike P. five times if he believed SOS was
inspired. He never answered.
My personal belief for any Newlyweds, engaged couples or veterans is this. When
two people are joined together in marriage. If united in love, in soul and Spirit,
that love “must” find expression. That “must” is as natural and “unsinful” as our
desire for eating or sleeping. Sex is God’s invention, pleasure it’s goal. Can sin
pervert it? Sure, just as eating can be contorted into bulimia and sleep devolve
into sluggishness, yet when experienced as designed, they should be received as
“good gifts!” Our Father delights to see His children enjoy the full range of what
it means to be human. To be whole. Redemption is bringing us back to “normal”, and
then more, much more. I also believe that God has granted this strange activity
called “sex” to give us a vocabulary, to aid our understanding into the deeper mysteries
of knowing our Oneness and Union with Him. Is that not what Paul meant in Eph. 5:31-32?
Husbands, I encourage you, for the display of Christ's love for His Church. Fan
into flame your passion for your wife, may your love for her percolate. Boil brother,
boil with intensity. Don’t be luke warm and so nauseate her, may your heart be a
burning flame, incinerating the slightest approach of unfaithful temptations. If
you love her in this way you will love yourself and God will be honored and glorified.
Ponder her needs, consider what pleases her. Be creative as your heavenly Father
is creative.
On this subject I’ve been accused of being out of my mind; if I am, it is for your
sake. tim